AlAnon helps, but . . .

Posted on September 15, 2009. Filed under: AlAnon | Tags: , , |

Went to an AlAnon meeting today and am including a few pearls:

•Hayley’s Eating Disorder (bulemia) is still, most likely, an issue.  She recently told her younger brother, Brian, that she’s afraid  that when she stops using heroin, her ED will come back.  Hayley went to a residential eating disorder treatment center in  2002.  She was essentially asked to leave after 45 days for     violating many rules (see future posts)

•It’s easier for me to be angry at Hayley – it provides some protection and is a shield against pain/hurt.  But this mask of  anger also cuts off the ability to give/receive love and compassion.  My heart is hardening.

•Addicts don’t respond to logic – only to pain.

•Co-dependency is a huge component of an addict’s  relationships with family members – especially with parents.

•Eventually, the addict will get sick and tired of being sick and tired, and will seek something different.

•We are dealing with the disease of addiction, not the person of  the heart – who that person (addict) really is.  Or are we?  One of my biggest fears is that my daughter will always be self-centered, narcissistic, manipulative.  These traits that she’s exhibited for so many years, may have become inextricably entwined in to her core being.

•I need a script when I talk to my daughter.  Here’s a good phrase:  “We look forward to when you’re in recovery and can rejoin our family.”  It sounds easy, doesn’t it?

Hope to list some good books I’ve read lately on addiction.  Next post.

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